So much for the revolution. When it comes to dads sharing the parenting role with moms, according to a new study, the man in the family is just not pulling his weight. The result: supremely ticked off mothers.
That’s the conclusion of a survey of 1,000 moms by Parenting magazine, with results appearing late last week on parenting.com.
According to the article, “We love our husbands — but we’re mad that we spend more mental energy on the details of parenting. We’re mad that having children has turned our lives upside down much more than theirs. We’re mad that these guys, who can manage businesses or keep track of thousands of pieces of sports trivia, can be clueless when it comes to what our kids are eating and what supplies they need for school. And more than anything else, we’re mad that they get more time to themselves than we do.”
Some specifics:
•46% of moms get irate with their husbands once a week or more. About half describe their anger as intense but passing; 1 in 10 say it’s “deep and long-lasting.”
•44% are annoyed that fathers often don’t notice what needs to be done around the house or with the kids.
•40% are peeved that their husbands seem clueless about the best way to take care of kids.
•40% are mad that Dad can’t multitask.
•33% say their husbands aren’t shouldering equal responsibility and are less concerned than moms are about their children’s basic needs, like nutrition and clothing.
•Nearly one third of moms complain that parenthood has changed their lives more than their husbands’.
•31% say their husbands don’t help with the chores — in fact, they generate more.
The more kids moms have, the more intense their negative feelings.
Moms responding to the survey express annoyance that dads repeatedly forget to do simple or essential tasks — like keeping an eye on the kids while mom cooks or remembering to put the children’s mittens on. They resent that dads don’t help get the kids off to school in the morning, or that they leave their own dirty dishes in the sink even though the dishwasher is empty. To many moms, dads seem incapable of multitasking, while moms regularly handle several different projects at once. Moms dislike constantly being the ones responsible for all the daily details of family life, from making sure to buy fresh vegetables for the kids to getting the car repaired. And most of all, they hate that dad seems able to find time for himself. The lack of time off is a major issue, especially for moms with the most anger. Over 60 percent of the moms who get mad weekly — and almost three-quarters of those who are angry every day — feel this way.
For more details on the study, visit www.parenting.com.